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   Thirsting for conquest, the Spartan prince Ananias had set out on a journey to conquer all he could get his hands on. With some of Sparta's most savage warriors, the evil prince sailed down the Aegean Sea, into the Mediterranean, to conquer Persia.

   But the Persians, with their strong navy, forced him back, taking an alternative route home, through the Black Sea. It was there, that he discovered us; the Pygmies. We had settled in Pygmalios, a tiny kingdom we'd built for ourselves, in forests near Thessalonika.

   I'm Petros, commander of the Pygmy armies, if there is such a thing. The average Pygmy is 6-9 inches tall, and never over a foot. At ten inches tall, I'm one of the tallest Pygmies there is. The feather I use to write this text is almost as tall as me.

   We were no match for Ananias, or Cyrian, Ananias' dreaded, towering lieutenant. The Spartan's easily conquered Pygmalios. Only a few, myself included, were able to escape.

   We sailed acrossed the Aegean Sea, through the Sea of Marmara, into the Black Sea, floating on leaves and twigs, until we came to Scythia, the land of the Amazons.

   The Amazons, all women, average 6-7 feet tall, and warriors, all of them. Using our diminutive size to our advantage we tried to cross their land undetected, fearing they might percieve us as an aggressive threat (yeah right!)

   It didn't work. Several of us were crushed underneath their giant sandals, and then we were eventually discovered by an Amazonian sentry while scrounging for food, and taken prisoner. I was chosen to be spokesperson, to talk to Cassandra, queen of the Amazons.

   I was placed on a table, and the Amazonian guard who had carried me there gave me two shucked peas to put in my ears, to protect my ear drums from the overwhelmingly loud voice of the giantess.

   Cassandra soon appeared before me. She was dressed in a small, leapord skin shawl, but nothing else. Nearly 7 feet tall, she was an exquisite beauty. Shapely, with long, flowing, auburn-colored hair, and blue eyes as deep as the Mediterranean Sea.

   "Why do you invade our lands, Pygmy?" she asked, her voice calm yet commanding. Even with the peas in my ears I was still almost blown appart, as I fell over.

   "Standing back up I spoke as loud as I could. It was fortunate that Amazons have giant ears, and keen senses, because it allowed myself to be heard. "Forgive us, you're excellence," I said, a bit shakey, "But we were conquered by Spartans. A few of us who escaped sailed down the Black Sea. We are just trying to find a place to start over."

   Her face glared with pure contempt. I thought for sure she was seconds away from wrapping me up in a grape leaf and eating me as a first course, with a glass of Retsina. Fortunatly for me, that was not the case.

   "I am half-Athenien," she said, with a hint of venom, "Spartan's killed my father." At first I was relieved. Then, I started realizing the potential. I could offer her a chance at vengeance, and free my people.

   "Your excellence," I said, still a bit shakey, as I couldn't believe I could be bold enough to say what I was about to suggest. "If your warriors were to help free our people, I would be forever in your debt." Cassandra was silent for a moment. Then, a devious smile curled up on her lips.

   My tiny heart skipped a beat. The moment seemed like hours. Finally, she spoke. "Alright, my little friend," she said, "But if I help you, then you and your little army must work off your debts as servants to me and my ladies.

   I gladly agreed, for I had no other choice. So the Amazonians took off with us for Pygmalios, to fight the Spartans. The Spartans, as firece and might of warriors as they were, we completely surprised and overwhelmed by the powerful Amazons force.

   Cassandra slew the gigantic Cyrian herself. His power was great, but she was more cunning. She outslyed him, defeating him and chopping his head off, and mounting it on her mantle, preserved in spirits. It is still here today.

   Ananias was forced back to Sparta in shame, and the Spartan prisoners were taken as slaves. With Spartan slaves being much more bigger, stronger, more capable, and certainly a lot more taller, made us obsolete as servants of the Amazons. The pygmies were all allowed free passage back to Pygmalios. Except for me.

   "As you said, little Pygmy," Cassandra reminded me, "You are forever in my debt."

   So I became her pet. I strapped on her sandals, massaged and cleaned her feet, and played games with her. She always won, as I dared not let her lose.

   But my fear diminished as her maternal instincts kicked in, and I became less of a servant, and more of a friend. We talked a lot, as she was very lonely. Crazy as it seems, despite the fact that I'm barely taller than her ankles, she started falling in love with me.

   So we wed, making me by default, king the Amazons, (the irony of that still makes me laugh.) Because of our great size difference, children were out of the question. So we had a Spartan slave act as a donor. Cassandra bore us a daughter, which we named Paris.

   It has been a strange dynamic. When my daughter holds me in her hand, I know she senses how powerless I feel, how I wish I could protect her, and take care of her, when in fact the opposite is reality. She understands and assures me that she loves me just the same. She is always respectful, obedient, and affectionate. She could swallow me whole, should she want to, yet I know I'm safer in her hands than practically anywhere else.

   Overall, it's a small price ot pay for the life I'm living today. For I'd much rather strap on my wife and daughter's sandals, than to be crushed beneath the sandals of the Spartans. Being king of the Amazons does have it's benefits, after all.

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